ETHICAL
NON-MONOGAMY

Talk Therapy geared toward helping you open your relationship and create strong bonds with you partners.

Ethical non-monogamy [ENM] is an umbrella term. That means that an assortment of different individual relationship models fall under the broad definition of it. What they all have in common is that the relationship is not fully monogamous and that everyone involved is consenting to this vision/structure.

Research shows that about 1 in 5 Americans have been in an open relationship at some point in their lives. I can work with you at every phase of opening your relationship with intentionality and guidance.

ENM requires communication and lots of it. For example, a sex therapist suggests having a "what if" conversation before anyone takes anything into action. In therapy, we can help you have the necessary conversations to have a positive experience that helps you build security as a couple and make sure you are growing closer as a result.

Reasons you might consider an open relationship: You and your partner both have a lot of love to give and believe you can love more than one person at once. You want to explore your sexuality or sexual relationships with someone of a different gender. You and your partner have a case of mismatched libidos. You would like to deconstruct normativity.

Open Relationship Therapy

Ethical Non-Monogamy Therapy Might Include:

Working with your attachment style
Improving your communication
Relating to Jealousy
Building compersion
Working with time management
Expanding your network of interests
Enjoying more connection
Growing closer to your partner
Work with one partner wanting monogamy
Creating a life that custom fits your relationship

The Relationship Bill of Rights

You have the right, without shame, blame or guilt in all relationships:

To be free from coercion, violence & intimidation
To choose the level of involvement and intimacy you want
To have clear commitments
To revoke consent to any form of intimacy at any time
To be told the truth
To say no to requests
To hold and express differing points of view
To feel all your emotions
To grow and change
To make mistakes
To end a relationship
To feel and communicate your emotions and needs
To set boundaries concerning your privacy needs
To know your partner will work with you to resolve problems
To choose whether you want a monogamous or open relationship
To seek balance between what you give & what is given back to you

by Eve Rickert & Franklin Veaux

My Approach

I integrate different approaches to in working with my couples around open relationships. My modalities of focus include:

A Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy® (PACT), developed by Dr. Stan Tatkin, is a fusion of attachment theory, developmental neuroscience, and arousal regulation. PACT has a reputation for effectively treating attachment-based relationship injuries. This modality is geared toward healing insecure relationship patterns and building secure attachment in your relationship. Tracking nervous system responses and reactivity is a cornerstone of this approach as we work with co-regulation and self-regulation.

Narrative Therapy® is a non-pathologizing approach that is based on the notion that we make meaning of our lives through the stories we tell ourselves. These stories are constructed within the larger narratives that make up our social, political, and interpersonal contexts and they shape our reality. People often come to therapy when they experience themselves as living in stories that are dominated by disempowering and negative core beliefs. Our work together involves re-authoring and facilitating experiences that affirm new stories about who you are that are more empowering and aligned with your values. Narrative therapy really targets our internalized scripts about who we think we are and what is possible for us.

Emotionally Focused Therapy® (EFT) is based on 50-years of research into human bonding. EFT offers a map to the territory of love and can empower people to experience new ways to engage in the dances of connection and conflict to move closer to secure loving bonds. The EFT model prioritizes emotion and emotional regulation as the key organizing agents of relationship interactions. This modality helps people express their feelings on a deeper level and encourages vulnerability as the strongest currency of connection with ourselves and others.